Twas the Night Before Christmas!
by Gypsy Tollamer
Summary: Co-written by Gypsy and Akurei! This is our telling of the classic christmas poem with a Gypsy and Akurei Twist! Has Ronin and a touch of Gundam.. Rated for Inuendos and language (etc. etc.)


'Twas the Night Before Christmas (Gypsy an' Akurei Style!!!)  
  
By: Gypsy Tollamer and Akurei Difficile  
  
  
  
Gypsy: Akurei is my best pal and I love her a lot so we decided to write a Ronin fic together! Woo Hoo!!! She's one of the most knowledgable Ronin Warriors fans out there so feel free to email her Lynn9697@aol.com or email me at q_bean12@hotmail.com!! Thanx a lot! And please remember to review this fic when finished! If anything the new box thingy is nifty!  
  
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Gypsy: One day in Happy Ronin Warriors Land. *is reading from a giant fic script*  
  
Akurei: Hey, who says that Ronin Warrior Land is happy? *glares*  
  
Gypsy: Pardon me... One day in _________ (fill in your own personal choice for the way Ronin Warriors Land is feeling today)........  
  
Akurei: That's better..... You may continue..  
  
Gypsy: There were several Ronin Warriors characters hanging around in some random area in some random space...  
  
Akurei: creative....  
  
Gypsy: yo! I don't write teh cripts I just read em!!!  
  
Akurei: Um... Gypsy?  
  
Gypsy: Yeah?  
  
Akurei: You do write the scripts.... doi! *smacks Gypsy on the back of her fat head*  
  
Gypsy: Oh yeah.... *lightbulb* Back to the story now..... So, Twas the night before christmas and all through the room....  
  
Akurei: Don't you mean dynasty?  
  
Gypsy: Yeah but what ryhmes with dynasty?  
  
Akurei: Who says it has to rhyme?  
  
Gypsy: The official book to writing Fanfics that's what!  
  
Akurei: There's no book! You're a chronic liar so move over I'm writing this fic!! *grabs Gypsy and locks her in the closet* ha!  
  
Gypsy: (muffled by closet) don't you need the script??  
  
Akurei: Oh damn.... *stares* The hell with it! I'll improv...  
  
Gypsy: Hey, you can't do that!!  
  
Akurei: Can and will!! *sits down on the "Thinking Chair" and begins to tell her tale* Now, there were several characters around that day.. And those few sons of a bitches were Ryo, Cye, Kento, Rowen, and Sage....  
  
Gypsy: Ratings!!! There may be children present!  
  
Akurei: Shut up! *turns back to the audience* Those losers were...  
  
Rowen: hey..... Do we look like losers to you?  
  
Akurei: Do you need an answer?  
  
Rowen: Don't force me to make the tiger piss on you!  
  
Akurei: You think that scares me? It's Gypsy's week to do laundry!  
  
Gypsy: Then I'll just hide em behind the washer till it's your turn!  
  
Akurei: So that's how my pants got behind there...  
  
Gypsy: *inside teh closet she makes a "who me?" face*  
  
Akurei: Can I go on? *silence* Thankyou.... All these Ronin guys were sitting around waiting for Santa to come...  
  
Gypsy: You're supposed to rhyme!! Damn it!  
  
Akurei: *halo* ratings dear! You don't want to teach Timmy bad words do you *Pulls chibi audience member and shows him to the audience*  
  
Gypsy: I can't see through the door smart ass......  
  
Akurei: Does the story really need to rhyme? *all the Ronin boys knod*  
  
Kento: We get food for this right?  
  
Akurei: Gypsy!! *opens the closet door and sees her on her hands and knees looking through a pile of coats* What are you doing?  
  
Gypsy: Looking for Wufei... He's a closet case right??  
  
Akurei: Yep.. No women would have sex with him for fear of reproduction.....  
  
Gypsy: So, do I get to tell the story?  
  
Akurei: Have at it!! *Gypsy squeals adn lands in the "Thinking Chair"*  
  
Gypsy: Twas the Night before christmas and all through the room.  
  
Not a creature was stirring except for Cye dancing with the broom.  
  
The stocking were hung by teh chimney with care  
  
With hopes that Kayura would soon be there.  
  
With Rowen in the arm chair and the tiger in his lap.  
  
They all settled down for a long winters nap...  
  
Kento: No food? *akurei sits on him*  
  
Akurei: Finish the story.... Kayura's in it.. It should get interesting now...  
  
Gypsy: When all of the sudden there rose such a clatter.  
  
Kento sprung from the pantry to see what was a matter.  
  
Then what to his eyes should appear  
  
Then Good Kayura and 4 warlord- uhhhh deer!  
  
Warlords: Deer??  
  
Akurei: Go with it!  
  
Gypsy: She yelled with a sound.  
  
Kayura: "On Dais, Anubis, Sekhment, and Kale"  
  
Go pounce on the authoress and finish this tale!  
  
Gypsy: huh? What? No way! I'm not finished yet!  
  
Kayura: You are now.. I look whorish in this santa claus langerie!  
  
Gypsy: Hey it was all I could find on short notice. Have you ever tried to find a Sata Suit 2 weeks till christmas?  
  
Akurei: *getting up from her spot where Kento threw her when he "Sprung from the pantry"* I admit. This Fic needs to end....NOW..  
  
Gypsy: You're no fun!  
  
Akurei: How bout a little Yuli in your stocking?  
  
Gypsy: NO! Anything but that!! *picks up her garlic and crucifix*  
  
*all the boys are drooling over Kayura in the langerie and have kento smushed up against the window*  
  
Sage: Yum.....  
  
Kayura: ______ (insert naughty word) you. *she sweatdrops* This is lame...  
  
Anubis: No it's not... *whipes the drool from his mouth*  
  
Akurei: You want me to take away your swirly stick thing?  
  
Anubis: No.... *sighs and gets back in his harness* Let's get on with this.. *snaps on his big red nose* Finish the Damn Poem Gypsy!!!  
  
Gypsy: okay. okay! *puts on her poet glasses and tries to look scholarly*  
  
Akurei: NOW!  
  
Gypsy: *jumps in surprise* On top of the house, they had flew  
  
With a sleigh full of stuff and Kayura too!  
  
Cye was about to turn around  
  
Then down the chimney Kayura came with a bound...  
  
Dressed in lace from her boobs to her thighs  
  
All people with Y chromosones had goo goo eyes.  
  
She had on tight little combat boots with furry little strings  
  
and on her furry hat were holly springs  
  
She looked like a hooker with a bag for of toys  
  
Which were probably for a hentai's joys.... *Gypsy winks and nudges*  
  
And oh her eyes, how they twinkled! Her face so Merry.  
  
Her hair like silk and her ________(insert random body parts) like cherries....  
  
Kayura: Gypsy Louise Tollamer!!  
  
Sage: The middle name! Some one's in trouble!! *sings the little childs ditty* Gypsy's in trouble! Gypsy's in trouble! *everyone else is joining in slowly*  
  
Gypsy: Shut up! Or I'm gonna write a lemon with Relena and you're all gonna be in it!  
  
*they all shudder and then shut up*  
  
Gypsy: She acknowledged the ronin and gave em a wink  
  
And Kento moved over to drool in the sink  
  
She then placed packages under the tree  
  
except for Sage who was Jewish you see...  
  
Sage: I'm Jewish!  
  
Cye: Shut up this is the part where she strips and dances around!  
  
Kayura: I do not...  
  
Gypsy: Under the menorah she placed Sages bags  
  
and when she saw Mia's burnt cookies her whole ambience sagged  
  
She took on bite and then threw up.  
  
Swigged down the milk and adjusted her bra cups..  
  
The men all sighed with a jolly face  
  
As Kayura walked over to the fire place  
  
Then she put her hands on her hips and gave a gentle blow  
  
and up the chimney, did Kayura go!  
  
Kayura: Does that mean it's over?  
  
Gypsy: Yup, get out of the sleigh bitch...  
  
Akurei: before I pull out yonder whipping switch...  
  
*Kayura surrenders as Gypsy pulls the Gundam Boys out of the present sack. She adds them to the warlords pulling the sleigh*  
  
Gypsy: Care to make the call!  
  
Akurei: I guess so, but does that mean you get to say the ending line?  
  
Gypsy: *pretends to hear nothing*  
  
Kayura: You're not jsut gonna leave me here are you? *gypsy steals her Santa hat* Hey!!!  
  
Akurei: On Kale, On Anubis, On Sekhmet and Heero. On Quatre and Trowa, Dais, Wuffers and Duo!!!! *cracks the whip* Am I good or Am I good?  
  
Gypsy: and as we yelled as we flew out of sight!!  
  
MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL  
  
AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT!  
  
  
  
*all the ronin warriors have now climbed up the roof and are surrounding Kayura*  
  
Kayura: You in the pajamas. Mind calling 911?? Thanks! *endless twitching*  
  
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Akurei: I'm never ever gonna write another fic!  
  
Gypsy: Fun huh?  
  
Akurei: Uh huh yeah... Let me jsut rent out Anubis and Duo for the night.. *signs the forms and drags the two long haired gods off*  
  
Gypsy: Man! You left me with Wufei again!!! DAMN YOU AKUREI!!! *stomps her foot as Akurei's evil laughter is heard*  
  
please review......  
  
  
  
THE END...............(maybe) 


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